biological urges and what's what.

Man holidays are so boring. I cannot believe how bored I actually am these holidays.
Yes, i'm going to whinge about this now. Normally I wouldn't be so bored but these holidays I got ditched by many friends for their boyfriends. I feel so loved. I get that they wanna spend time together and all but what about me?! I'm here too. Am I not good enough anymore now that the boyfriends exist? :(

Anyways that got me thinking (as opposed to studying). This whole 'liking-someone' business it's actually pretty weird. We base what we call emotions on a secretion of certain chemicals that heighten certain reactions in our body. We see something that appeals to our sight the body releases endorphins and the end result is the whole convoluted mess we like to call emotions.

But seriously isn't it just a biological urge for us to find a mate and reproduce just to ensure the survival of the species? What's the point of these chemicals? Is it just so we can get a quick high out of it? Why not just do some drugs and achieve a similar high?

I noticed recently that when you're attracted to someone you get to the point where you tend to question yourself. Me in particular. I get so unsure whether I actually really do like the person or if this isn't just a passing phase. I don't understand that at all. No matter who it is - I'll always be unsure of myself. I wonder if that's why most of my relationships are unsuccessful. Hm. Or it could just be me as a whole? I guess I'll never know.

<3 Nina